Burma

It's ten years ago that Tomo and were in Burma, where we met the student rebels in the refugee camps on the Thai border, dissidents in Rangoon tea houses, where we saw roads built by slave labor, talked to monks in Theravada monestaries, partied with opium war lords in Lashio and hung with the Palaung rebel army in their liberated territories. After we arrived at the Lashio hotel with tourist license plates and left the next day with plates for Burmese nationals we had SLORC's secret service on our tail. We split up. I pulled a Forrest Gump at the airport and got the first batch of films past security without X-rays by acting stupid and confused. Tomo got the seconds batch a few days later smuggled on board with the meal service. It was rough then. It got dangerously rough today.

Read an English version of our story about Burma

Read a German version

Get the latest news from the The Burma Campaign

Get the propaganda spin from the military junta's daily New Light of Myanmar

Deep In Bavaria

So finally the Free State of Bavaria officially registered us as infidels. I think that county clerk thought, if she delays bureaucratic procedures long enough Fred might go into labour and that way she would've saved an innocent soul from the dreads of secular humanism. In Bavarian thinking God's law tends to overrule the constitution. But the ways of the devil of secularism are merciless, and so we produced each and every document she asked for correctly, timely and in a courteous manner, until she reluctantly had to put that stamp under form number 666. Whatever number that form has, she sure made us feel like we just signed such a pact. So as of now our flat rate plan to talk to God is voided. Most likely lines were cut already, when I wrote favorable reviews of Chri Ofili's "Holy Virigin Mary" and recent works of Richard Dawkins and Christopher Hitchens.

But we haven't reached the deepest depths of Bavarianism yet. This weekend is the official kick-off for this year's Oktoberfest. Fans have been gearing up already. At the county clerk's office the cashier was already wearing a Dirndl. When we went shopping on Viktualienmarkt today the levels of mid-day public drunkenness and wearing of leather-made short shorts were impressively high. More to come. For weeks on end now.

In God's Country

Not being of faith is an active chore in Germany. After 20 years abroad I wasn't aware of the fact that I'm still considered a member of the Lutheran congregation, despite the fact that my hippie parents had me blessed by the Guru Maharishi Yogi when I was about seven (he's the one with the levitation trick, but hey - it was 1969 and he was the Beatles' guru, so I have to give them credit for being very much with it). Despite widespread resentment of America being a de facto religious state, the seperation of church and state in Germany is far behind the US. Church officials still sit on boards of public institutions all over Germany, including public radio and TV. Their are harsh penalties and steep fines for blasphemy. In Munich no building can be higher than the main church. On certain holidays it's against the law to dance and party, which almost got the MTV Europe Awards cancelled in Munich this year. Anyway - the law of the church caught up with me, because if you do not apply for non-religious status, a church tax amounting to five percent of your income tax is added automatically to your tax bill. Which I recently noticed.

We tried to correct this, but they don't make it that easy. The county clerk was a middle-aged, grey haired woman whose mood was about as bright as a Wackenhut guard's. She didn't even try to hide her disdain for all heretics wanting to leave the Christian faith, accompanying every step of the bueraucratic process with eye-rolling, grunting and sneering. We didn't take it personal, since a young, Turkish looking woman passed through the office who obviously just had been through the bureaucratic ringer. Anyway, after a lot of grunting and sneering she tried to explain to us, that the Bronx and Brooklyn, where we got married/registered are mere quarters, can not be seperate cities or counties (a classic German trait by the way, insisting on points made, but I was actually glad, because after twenty years in New York I can still get lost). When she finally had it with us godless pests she demanded to see a copy of our wedding license. Which we actually had in our car down in the garage, but she pointed out that we had to get it in two and half minutes, because then her lunch break would begin. So we gonna have to try again tomorrow.

More soon.

Raceway Crack

I always thought racing cars is one of the most radical sports. Now I know two guys who actually do it. Sebastian bought himself a vintage Porsche, which he's racing in rallyes around Europe. The true king of racing for sure is Joseph Fratesi, who's got a souped up 80s Volkswagen in his Park Slope backyard. Every other week he's taking his number 77 to the Northeastern tracks. Rich just went along to a race in the Poconos, where Joseph got silver. Sure sounds like a weekend after my taste. Right on Team Fratesi! Next year - Riverhead Raceway! The original track of champions, where I've seen some mean racings skills, before 'Whiplash' Joe finished a field of Demolition Derby contestants like a plate of juicy chicken wings. Let's be honest. Who wants to see some skinny tabloid stars race some oddly shaped scream machines around some mediterranean retirement resort.

Birdland (R.I.P.)

We were about 16, 17 years old, testing our musical chops with overly complicated fusion arrangements in the basement rehearsal room of our friend Wolfgang. His father was a big shot TV and commercial composer from Vienna and one of his best friends was Joe Zawinul, legendary Viennese sideman of Cannonball and Miles. When Zawinul was in town he would drop in for coffee and cake. Once he came down to the basement, highly amused that those skinny Germans would get all excited about meeting the composer of 'Birdland', which we had played a lot on the open air circuit around Munich. He jammed for a while, which was moist likely the most impressive musical experience for any of us.

Years later I ran into him at the Broadway Diner in Santa Monica. He didn't remember me, but he sure remembered the session with the German fusion fan teens. Which still amused him. This morning he died in Vienna.

Zawinul and Weather Report playing Birdland

Zawinul and the Cannonball Adderley Sextet

Zawinul and Miles Davis

Flowchart Philosophy

Kool-Aid Anyone?

For this year's 911 anniversary Bin Laden came out with a new video. Excerpts were broadcasted by Al Jazeera (see above). He dyed his heard and recommends books by Noam Chomsky and Michael Scheuer. What next? Is he gonna move to the Upper Westside and start a book club? He also asks all Americans to convert to Islam to avoid further terror. Kool-Aid anyone?

Download the English transcript as PDF

Lessons In Branding

After Naomi Klein established herself as the first prominent face of the faceless and non-hierarchical anti-globailisation movement with her branding critique "No Logo", the pressure was on to deliver a second global bestseller though. Now she delivers - "The Shock Doctrine" promises to be another hit for the knee-jerk crowd. Which might have something to do with the brillance Naomi Klein styles herself as her own brand including unique selling points, brand positioning and recognizable brand patterns. She's also pushing her book with the latest in modern marketing - a viral YouTube video. Although advertised as a short film created by Klein and director Jonas Cuaron it's not much more than a Fox News style commercial.