Of course when you have a new baby you will be showered with heartfelt congratulations and heartbreakingly sweet presents. One slight difference between German and American congratulations though. While both will congratulate you on the beauty/sweetness/cuteness/lookalikeness of your newborn, German congratulations mostly come with a disclaimer and/or damper. Our top five (plus variations) so far:
- Well, you can't tell, if it's a colic baby before it's four to six weeks old, can you.
- So have you heard about this East German couple/mother who starved/smothered/shook their baby to death?
- Juggling a baby and everyday life is pretty rough, no? So how are you gonna do that (from close relatives living nearby)?
- Now did you hear this about these friends of ours and they only discovered how sick their baby was after everything seemed normal for months?
- And the all-time German classic: Oh, he's really cute. And so sweet. Well, the problems mostly start later.
Yes, it's a German thing. Yes, it's genetic. No, neither me nor Fred have that gene, so maybe Karl's safe. But you don't know that until later, do you?
Pessimist's mug availabe at despair.com
No comments:
Post a Comment